No Shave November is almost over, but Ted Cruz’s “beard” looks like it’s just seconds old.
On Monday, Business Insider’s Joe Perticone tweeted that Ted Cruz had “grown a beard” over the Thanksgiving break, but some people are having a hard time locating it.
If you zoom in on the photo of Cruz, you’ll notice that dark area around certain parts of his jawline (and not at all his chin) appears to be hair. Not a shadow. Not dirt. Hmm. Fascinating.
If staring at Ted’s bare chin has boggled your mind a bit and you’ve forgotten what a beard looks, shift your gaze to the two men behind the Texas Senator who definitely have beards. See the difference?
There are several theories floating around as to why exactly Cruz decided to go grunge, but those who aren’t overthinking the reasoning behind the facial hair are just plain appalled at how comically bad it looks.
Ted Cruz grew a shitty beard to distract us from the fact that he can’t grow a regular looking beard
— Tamara Yajia (@DancesWithTamis) November 27, 2018
I found a maggot in my oatmeal this morning, which was not good, though it was arguably less disturbing than seeing Ted Cruz with his “beard,” so. I got that going for me.
— Chuck Wendig (@ChuckWendig) November 27, 2018
This is a real beard in much the same way that Ted Cruz is a real human being.
— Mikey Franklin (@mikeyfranklin) November 27, 2018
I can’t believe it took Ted Cruz to disprove my theory that a beard can make any man passably hot
— Jessica Roy (@JessicaKRoy) November 27, 2018
In the paraphrased words of Green Day, “Wake me up when No Shave November ends.”