Politicians! If they didn’t have fistfuls of loot to hand out we’d throw rocks at them. Two blatantly false denials on Wednesday: the first, Scott Morrison’s aged care minister Ken Wyatt denying (withstanding unforgivably imprecise questioning) his secret talks with Linda Burney to defect to Labor; the second, Morrison’s disavowal of our report that media billionaires Rupert Murdoch and Kerry Stokes argued over the wisdom of Malcolm Turnbull’s overthrow.
First to Wyatt. We dare him to take a lie detector test. We stand by our report. There is zero doubt he had, before this royal commission thrust him into the limelight, been haggling behind the scenes with senior Labor parliamentarians and party officials about changing sides. If that’s not the case, as Kerry Packer used to say, we’ll throw a garden party.
Secondly to the interim Prime Minister, who must have to eat Explorer socks for breakfast just to pad out his insides. Asked about our report (exclusively re-reported a day later by yet another epic flog employed by Gaven Morris at the ABC) that News Corporation’s Murdoch told Seven West Media’s Stokes that “Malcolm has got to go”, ScoMo claimed on Wednesday that, “I don’t think it happened. I don’t believe it happened at all, and you’d think I’d know, given I was involved.”
Involved? Hang on, he’s always maintained the prime ministership landed on him like a snowflake in Baghdad. His hands couldn’t have been cleaner if he was running Ansell.
How can someone who had his exalted office foisted upon him, as if he lay waiting in some cocoon, swear that a conversation he wasn’t party to never happened, despite the account of which both parties to it haven’t denied? What a dead-set brown banana.
Hang on, this is the guy who postures as the Cronulla Sharks’ greatest evangelist, having spent his entire life in Sydney’s eastern suburbs until he picked Cook as his best chance in 2006. He shrugs this off, naturally, as airily as Rupert’s musings. Just never happened!
Loyal until he’s not
No doubt like he’ll shrug off his confession of March 2010 that he was “backing the Western Bulldogs 2nite”, later admitting it was “because Rodney Eade sparked my interest in the great game”. The same September 2009 day ScoMo tweeted his true and real support for the “snarling Bulldogs” (Footscray, not Canterbury in the underpants department on Mad Monday), he followed with, “AND LOYALTY COUNTS”. No punchline required. And note that The Australian’s Greg Brown uncovered most of this several days ago.
ScoMo came out on Monday as a Melbourne Demons fan (in fairness, he’s hardly the only carpetbagger to discover a sudden affection for that footy club in its happier times). But if the PM thinks God-fearing Victorians will cop a club jumper, he’s even dumber than his voters in the Shire (hi Mum!).
It goes to character, your honour. This fella stands for absolutely nothing, his mission a fair go for the fair go people who fairly go about wanting a fair go in the fair go department. He’s a calculated construct, an utterly vacant one; a cautionary tale for machine men needing to remain precisely so. He’s the same virus Sussex Street infected its own parliamentary wing with. Other than that, though, he’s braining it.